Crown Chakra, Heart Chakra, Root Chakra, Sacral Chakra, Solar Chakra, Third Eye Chakra, Throat Chakra

Reflection of 2017

Going into and maintaining throughout the year of 2017 has been the toughest task of my life.  “Dont expect others to value you as much as you value yourself” -Moore. 2017 started off with a break/separation that was long over due from one person I expected to cherish me the most. December 16, 2016 I moved out of a home I shared with my “other half” into my own space. Living alone on my own for the first time in life was pretty depressing starting off. I struggled with having steady income, being behind in school and failing courses in graduate school. My self-esteem hit rock bottom and I was completely unhappy with life. One day I began to write in my box and the first thing I wrote to myself was ” Self-love and Self-care, learn it”. From that moment I no longer wanted to dwell on what was and I decided to stop stressing over little things.

“Growth is a must. Starve your distractions  and feed  your focus” – Eball. It was time to focus and find things that made me happy and learn to be independent without depending/needing the presence of others.  So I did that! I recorded my progress in my box. I decided to delete all social media for a year, take a break from school and just go on this self exploration journey! Mission accomplished…. 2017 I renewed my passport and traveled to two places out the country I’ve never been and one recurring place. I traveled to over 20 new states this year.

“The more we learn, the more we learn, the more we have to learn” K. Anderson. As the year progressed I’ve learned more and more about myself. I’ve learned how to be humble (hardest task ever)  I’ve learned happiness, I’ve learned how to meditate properly and become more grounded, I’ve learned inner peace, I’ve learned that I wear my emotions on my sleeve and talking to someone always helps. I’ve learned not to take things serious, I am no longer AS agressive as I use to be, I’ve learned that I gain satisfaction by seeing other happy. I’ve learned to give advice, I’ve learned to be more productive with my job, I’ve learned coping skills from work that I was able to utilize for myself.

Lastly I learned “true love = trust = health = promise = faith = unity = peace = mind = strength = forgiveness = life = you”-Amal. Best part about my struggle was having the support from work and my friends. Always surround yourself with positive beings! Any obstacle is nothing more but a life lesson. A year full of chaos was nothing more than a beautiful struggle I endured on my own.

Everyone knows that I grew as the only child and spoiled. But my mom cut the cord once I graduated from undergraduate school. I accomplished so much on my own this year (even though I graduated two years ago). I am ending 2017 with positivity and a smile. OOOOHHHH I also learned that I am expecting and I looking forward to meeting my little one when that time comes. In 2018 my goal is to be a more balanced individual and an awesome mom!!!

 

“Remember to love selflessly not selfishly”

12/31/2017

p.s All quotes came from my box of 2017 from co-workers and family members! thank you guys again.

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Root Chakra, Solar Chakra, Third Eye Chakra, Throat Chakra

Box of 2017

Going into the new year of 2017 started off pretty rough. The clinician at my previous job gave me the idea of making a forgiveness box for those who brought negativity in my life. I started off with the first couple of sticky notes with forgiveness statements and quotes, but I realized I didn’t really want to do that anymore. I wanted to create box where for the year of 2017 I write down things I was going to learn from, life experiences, things I would accomplish, quotes/book sayings or even advice given by family friends. Of course I also wanted to keep the forgiveness thing going as well.

I brought a safe box from Walmart and attempted to decorate it but using spray paint and glitter, unfortunately it didn’t come out the way I vision it would be. As the year began to pass by I began to have others participate as well, I took my box to work encouraging my coworkers to write things they have learned so far this year whether it be from a quote or life experiences. I also had my clients and friends participate too! Anyone who came to visit while at home had to write in the box before entering my home. The goal is to see how much everyone actually progressed through the year. Are people actually paying attention to what goes on in their lives? Are they learning from positive or negative life experiences? Have any changes been made? From December of 2016-December of 2017 I  promised not to read any of the submission until New Years Eve.

WELL today is my lucky day! I am super excited to see what others have written as well as myself. Thank you to everyone who participated!

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Heart Chakra, Root Chakra

Bermuda

Yes living the best life I can as Brittaney would say!

I have never worked for anyone who appreciates their employees enough to take them on a cruise!

Royal Caribbean best cruise line ever, everyone knows it! I wish I could share the detail on the pricing but I didn’t pay for much. Overall the room was nice, I didn’t like the obstructed balcony i had it ruined the view. I found myself going to co-worker room just to compare their balcony view with mine. Two days at sea before actually reaching the Island was tough, as much as I wanted to engage into the partying and drinking I was exhausted my first night on the boat I fell asleep fully clothes thinking I was going to a party…yeah sleep got me real good! Second day at sea I finessed my way into getting free drinks everywhere I went because 300 plus dollars was not an option for me for a drink package, No way! Blah Blah… okay Views from when we did get to Bermuda.

See where the yellow boats are?? yup that’s where my balcony is and that’s all i can see on it is yellow boats, what a drag! It took us forever to get off the boat because some of the gang woke up late! but this is some as they got off the boat.

We didn’t know where to explore so we walked around just site seeing.

We were introduced to the pink sand beach, which was a 20 minute drive from the dock.. So we got to see Different parts of Bermuda, it was beautiful!

By the way if you didn’t know and ever want to travel to the Caribbean, they do drive on the left side of the road and right side of the car! FYI. Driving to the beach was a bit scary, the driver didn’t really stay in his lane and the roads were very tiny, as well as curvy. But!!! we made it there safe =).  As soon as we got closer to the beach there a set of tall rocks and I was determine to climb them just to get a better view of everything. It was hard climbing rocks barefooted, but it was doable.

The scenery at this beach was beautiful and yes the sand was pink but I didn’t take any pictures of it oddly. It was hot as hell out as well! I felt like I lost 20 pounds….But anyway my favorite part of the cruise was the crew members! I absolutely adored them and made friends quick. They were polite, helpful and funny. They played a big part into why I enjoyed myself the most on this trip.

Albert, Pratmesh and Nuur were the crew member who made my stay very comfortable! One even adopted me as his cousin..lol! the Crew member kept us in the loop about the events that were happening at night off the ship! A “big” party gathering with not just people from the cruise but locals was a great experience. Caution/Safety was a huge factor due to hearing horror stories about kidnappings and killings of cruise member when then come to Bermuda.

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I was definitely ready for a good time, being that I slept a lot on the ship, attending one event at night wasn’t going to kill me! plus my boss and co-workers complained about not seeing me much! The party was nice!! lots of drunk individuals just having a good time!

Sadly I had an allergic reaction to something I ate or drunk and was in need of something to calm the inflammation down. I broke out all over my face, chest and back the next day. so I went from looking hot above to looking like this…

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I felt like the world was over and my vacation was ruined lol! But luckily when I’m home i would soak in a bath salt, so it was only right to get in the salt water! I stayed at the beach in the water for hours it took me 2 hours to get in the water and be comfortable because it was so cold! The salt water did eliminate the inflammation, but once i got out my skin was peeling like a mutant.

Overall my vacation was awesome! Nothing but good vibes and good people I loved it!!!. Sadly I came home after a week of being away and struggled to adjust back into the real world. From these two trips, I gave myself goals to travel to at least 32 states and 15 countries before I’m 30.

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Sacral Chakra, Third Eye Chakra, Throat Chakra

Do high expectations set you up for disappointments?

We all have expectations in our lives. Me personally I have expectations of myself and others. I do believe having expectation can affects ones happiness, if you allow it to. The easiest thing people can say is to not have expectations of others, but my thing is whether you’re my friend, family member, significant other, dog, cat, if i put a certain effort into something based off of our relationship I’m going to “want” the same effort back. I was told ” the nature of relationships shows that one might give more and others might or might not, everyone behavior is different”. I try to always put a lot of effort into a relationship doesn’t matter which one it is and as stated before I “would like” the same in return. Sometimes I live up to my expectations and others usually don’t, but that’s okay! Just because you shoot for the  stars doesn’t means others will be willing to do the same. My co-worker stated that he always have high expaectations of people he surround himself by and whether or not they meet his expecatations, he never give up, he keeps trying. I thinks its great to have high expaectations, holding not only yourself but others to a high standard pushes everyone to be a better person. Most people perform their best when living up to high expectations. When people don’t live up to my expectations I am slightly disappointed, but that’s my issue not theirs and no one should be penalized for it. I can’t change a person or judge them for not living up to what I wanted them too, because at the end of the daythey don’t owe me anything. You learn a person flaws and who they are when expectations are put in place, that doesn’t mean become disappointed with them. It’s all a learning experience!  So its okay to have low or high expectations and there’s nothing wrong with being the one who often goes above and beyond all the time. I love knowing that I put my best effort into something whether I get what i want back or not. My attempt to the goal was enough satisfaction to keep myself pleased. So never be disappointed when people don’t live p to “your” expectations, just be great and continue aiming high!

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Crown Chakra, Solar Chakra

Loc’Versary

I’m a little late on some post I’ve been extremely busy and I have zero time management skills.

As of July 13, 2017, marks three years of my Loc journey. These three years has been tough, but it taught me how to love myself unconditionally. When I started my locs I was excited to have them, until no one around me ever had anything nice to say about them. My self-esteem hit rock bottom and I constantly questioned if I made a mistake. The thought of cutting my hair off and starting over just wasn’t an option for me anymore. As the process progressed I started to hate how I looked and I felt completely hideous…. Every day I received unacceptable comments from my friends, family and even my work place. It’s like when you meet someone new the first thing they look at was my hair I felt like I didn’t fit in anywhere. A year passed, then they began to grow on me, I had my days where I would stare at myself in the mirror for hours practicing positive statements (e.g “Fatima you are a beautiful black queen”). At one point, I was wearing make-up excessively to make up for my insecurities and everyone who knows me know I’m not a huge fan of make-up. Second year came around and I started not to care about what others thought, my dad had Locs my entire life and as a Rastamon he never tried to fit into society means. Growing up in mix cultural family no matter where in the world whether in Jamaica or here in American having locs were never accepted, they are considered dreadful, dirty and whatever else people came up with. He told me I had to start loving myself in order to feel real beauty. My dad and I aren’t really so his advice meant a lot to me, yet he was the only one who ever made me feel good about my journey. My locs started to grow longer every couple of months and after a while the compliments started, at this point I didn’t care if anyone had something mean or nice to say about my hair. I am completely in love with my Locs and how I look with them. There’s nothing dreadful about my locs and I am quick to comment when people refer to my hair as “dreadlocks”
I am my hair and pretty girls do Loc!

 

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Root Chakra, Solar Chakra, Third Eye Chakra

Day 4

Word choice: Enjoy, Journey, and failure.


Wherever there’s failure there’s success. Failure hurts but it’s indeed a part of life, I’ve failed more than I would ever admit. I can’t say I like failing but I’m human. BUT without failure what do you learn? Failure has taught to me how to be compassionate, empathetic and goal oriented. It’s always good to fail because its a steppingstone. When people become successful they always forget their journey, their struggle and past. Every time I failed at something at that moment I became overwhelmed, stressed out and even more dramatic than I am now! The journey of failure shaped my character, taught me growth, and allowed me to become humble. Without failure how would you reach your potential?….

They say “if you never failed, you’ve never lived” so everyone go out and fail at something lol just kidding!

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Root Chakra

Attempting to Eat better

Recently I was informed by my doctor that I’m negative blood type and that I needed to eliminate certain foods out my diet. Now everyone who knows me know I am a pretty healthy eater. I’ve tried the vegan lifestyle, enjoyed it but it wasn’t for me and vegetarian as well but I love fish tooo much! Sadly my doctor told me I had to eliminate the fish part and only consume veggies, fruits and whatever else that would provide me protein. Well above there is a piece of fish in the picture of course, tuna steak to be exact! Now I’ve been eating salads for lunch for two weeks straight with fish, trying to be on this weight loss journey and become more healthier. Needless to say I am miserable lol salads are starting to taste like grass and after my workouts I’m always extremely hungry. I enjoy being a pescatarian and I dread the idea of not eating fish anymore. I gained more weight attempting to be a vegan/vegetarian than I have eating fish. Taking any supplement or pill is against everything I stand for, so the idea of taking a b12 supplement isn’t an option for me especially when I can eat fish. I can say my diet is weird, I don’t like eggs, milk (unless its almond milk), and certain cheese. Guess I’m all over the place! Still trying to figure things out, but If you’re reading this post and have any suggestions to make the journey less hectic  please don’t hesitate to comment.

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